WINE PUNK

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So if you want to be a "wine expert" here you go. It's not that hard. Though 11 layers of wine narrative isn't necessary. I did this, just to put the show of cosmetic authority with wine to bed. This knowledgebase has little to do with expertise, rather discussions of wine have more to do with the art of selective narrative than the wine itself, as one can trace the design of the narrative to see that, the category, as indicated by the dominant node, entitled "wine," is being emphasized (vs. a relational analysis, like the design of Plato). That is, the irrational agency, of embodied performance is being emphasized and not to any degree of specificity as nodes connecting to the dominant node are typically generalized and vague (Differing from scientific narrative that is categorical and specific, like phage research). So by all means, to those in the court, to those working hard to be the best cosmetic authorities they can be, practice your play with words, achieve your levels, but those who trace the design know what wine expertise, as opposed to wine assistance, actually is. And yes, there are ways of identifying select forms of wine production and studying about these specific productions, but creative forms, of new methods, like old world styles from new world producers, or new world styles from old world producers will not hold to any significant form of examination, as it is the show with what is predictable that holds the anecdotal focus for examination; Fit for cosmetic authority. Wine Punks need not apply. Cheers!

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Menu Pretension

Broadening the Wine Menu for Show

So this wine menu is excellent, but this is the place that turned me completely off to the existing approach to sommelier service, which after I finish with my wine informatic project I can hit home why that is. Frankly, most people who come here are overwhelmed by the menu and the servers typically are working so fast that they have a handful of favorite go to's, as it's just not feasible to know every wine on the list, and during the tastings there is a lot of wine palette relativism, which will indeed be the case for all drinkers, but that isn't helping consumers understand the value of their purchase, so oftentimes, the "wine experience" remains good insofar as the novelty of drinking a new wine, to which I grew frustrated over this format, as I cannot see "what's the point?" After working with Antoine's Sommeliers, I expected more not only for myself but for the guests. But at the end of the day, Chicago can be a flock-eat-dog kind of city, so establishments need to aggressively pursue money to compete. In terms of making money, in terms of attracting the food network, the concept works. However, the people who run the operation, carry on as if they are dissatisfied, as if they are going through the motions as they wall themselves up with a product offering that is too broad to be properly followed or understood. That's not passion. That's not authentic desire. It's show. It's a culture that embodies greatness, but has no soul. It's food celebrity.

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Tasting Grid

Reading a wine for yourself...

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Wine Notes

Reading a wine for yourself...

So for the more nuanced smells, here is a chart by Wine Folly. Check out the website. It's good. However, much of the wine world, even of the more personable and hip framing, is pretension. I just don't see the need of having so many instructions and tutorials on wine, though all of it is good for entertainment. This chart though is all most people will ever need. This is a good guide for understanding a wine without the preconceived notions of what a wine already is. I say this because, unless you are assessing wine for investment, buyers don't care what a wine will be. Rather, they want to understand the wine they are purchasing to drink for the given moment, which can and oftentimes does, break the rules of what is expected. So again, moving beyond the pretension and showiness that intends on marketing wine, these are the actual flavors that one can learn to identify in order to assess the wine confidently by their own account, identifying the quality as an actual culinary measure and not a mere measure of price. I mean, why pay for something if you can't understand what you are paying for? It's best to know the worth of the product purchased, as would be the same case for buying a house or car.

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Welcome

About this site

Simply put this is my wine website, intended to be low brow and tacky for the kid at heart who prefers wine without the pretension. The inspiration for this site comes from certain "Well-Traveled, Cellar-Endowed" types who attempt to assess my "wine knowledge" in a trivializing manner, e.g. "Have you had wine from this region?" "What do you think of the soil?" "When we were there, you know, the place that you were not, we ate the soil and found it to be a divine measure of the grape quality?" "How do you measure your grapes?" So to many, the sommelier represents the opportunity for those of wealth to engage in a pissing match with those who represent the everyday; And that's my point.

Most sommeliers represent the everyday wine drinker, so the focus isn't on knowing every trivializing aspect of wine. There may be a need to specialize in certain wine regions if one seeks to assess wine on an investment basis. However, most sommeliers are not this. Rather, they are generalist seeking to give people the tools to assess wine for themselves. Do any of us need to assess the wine? Nope! Which then begs the question why do it? Easy, diners are paying money for a product, and many of them, who do not sample various tastings like service employees who undertake tastings for wine menus, will likely request assistance in understanding the bottle they are drinking. That's why I am a sommelier. It's part of my job. I've worked with large wine cellars, and took the first level, just to ensure I had a good working breadth of knowledge. This does not mean I am a walking dictionary of wine knowledge. No one is! So why carry on as if I am a dictionary, when such an orientation to the "sommelier" is unreasonable? Easy, some people just enjoy partaking in the bigotries of classism. Yes, I am not going to be cellar-endowed or well-traveled (which in my case this is a choice I have made, being that the "Edinburgh" tradition had its desires of me that I am thoroughly rejecting and not by way of philosophy, but rather by way of informatic production). However, unlike most drinkers, I work with wine methodically, on the basis of a professional framework. That is I try not to know the particulars of wine, but rather tour guide someone through the tasting experience, quickly (while doing a million other things in real-time), so one who has paid for a bottle can assess the value of that bottle for themselves, and hopefully over time, to know the good bottles from the bad bottles, the one notes from the dynamic orchestrations. But let's do talk about wine, so I can give all of the wrong answers, outright lie, or simply not know, in the process of engaging one who elects to trivialize who I am and my job. Somm is the result of years of grunt work in the service industry. Beyond the surface, I just don't find the "Sommelier" to be a romantic profession. In fact, other than assessing wine for investment (A Specialized Master Sommelier), I don't see the "Sommelier" being a profession at all. It's just a consequence of working in the service industry for a long time.

XOXO

Wine Punk